25 February 2013

The End -- February 25, 2013

Dear Family and Friends,

Well, this is my last email home. It´s actually a lot harder to believe than I thought it would be. A big part of me is in denial and just feels like I will be here in this same cyber writing you another email next week, just like always--crappy keyboards, raggaeton, and the sound of gunshots (from teenagers playing first-person shooter games), blasting in the background.

Ending my mission is harder than I anticipated. It has only been 5 weeks since I got here to Reconquista, but it is possibly the area I have loved the most. I love it here. Which is interesting since it is not a favorite of most missionaries. Reconquista has a history of being a little dysfunctional and difficult for missionary work. There are lots of tragedies and scandals that mark the local church history here. This used to be a thriving district with many strong branches and now it is down to 3 struggling branches with only a handful of faithful families. But from the moment I stepped off our bus in the bus terminal I just felt something special for this place... And these 5 weeks have been filled with so many dear and sacred experiences.

It is amazing how things come full circle. I started my mission in Goya, which is another small city just a few hours down the Parana river from here. People often travel between Goya and Reconquista and they have a lot in common and are considered sister cities.

Yesterday before church we headed out early, just like always, to help get investigators and inactive members to sacrament meeting. Every house we passed by, there was some sort of problem or excuse (they were sick, they overslept, they were expecting company, etc).

We even spent 10 minutes clapping and knocking and calling and trying to wake up the kids in one inactive family who had promised they would come to church with us--but to no avail. Feeling pretty discouraged (especially considering that this was my last Sunday in the mission) we started walking quickly towards the chapel, afraid we´d be late. When we were just a few blocks away we saw Gino (one of the boys we had been trying to wake up) riding his bike with Rodrigo (one of our investigators) sitting on the handlebars. We were so happy!

Then, sitting in the chapel, sweaty and tired and worn out from a morning of work--we watched as one by one, several other members and investigators arrived all by themselves. One woman, a new investigator, had come with some neighbors to our branch activity this week on Friday and decided, all by herself, that she wanted to come to church. We haven´t even taught her a single lesson yet, but she stayed all 3 hours and loved it and we are meeting with her this Tuesday.

In sacrament meeting, I was asked to give my testimony and I was tearing up before I even got up to the pulpit. And then when i got up there and looked out at all these people I love so much, I started crying for real (we had the best attendance both in terms of investigators and in members that we´ve had my whole time here...which I consider a tender mercy and miracle for my last Sunday in the mission)... but anyways I managed to pull myself together. And I shared a few words, and a scripture that seemed particularly perfect in light of that morning´s experience and many of my other experiences in my mission. It is 2 Nephi 25:23 -- "For we labor diligently to write, to persuade our children, and also our brethren, to believe in Christ, and to be reconciled to God; for we know that it is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do."

I believe in grace. I know that it is through the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ that we are saved (after all that we can do). Often "all that I can do" is so very little. But I know that God can take my weak and flawed strivings and with His grace it is somehow, incredibly, enough, and that He can even make miracles happen. Let me tell you, it is a VERY humbling experience being at the end of my mission. I still go to district meetings and conferences and hear the same things I have been hearing since I started my mission about how to be more obedient and how to teach and find and make commitments, etc, and I realize that I still need to improve and change so many things and that I literally have no time left. I feel humbled, but I do not feel any great regrets. I feel like I have given my best, and I have a whole lifetime to continue to learn and grow and apply the things I have learned here in Argentina about serving and helping in God´s kingdom in whatever small way I can. I know there is similar work to do at home and I am ready and excited to do it.

I am sad to leave, but please believe me when I say that I am also beyond excited to see all of you back home. I love you all so much and have missed you my whole mission, so it will be a wonderful reunion. I think in many ways I am the same Brooke I was when I left, and in many other ways, many of which I have yet to discover, I have grown and changed. You will have to see what you think when I get back.

Well, until Saturday,

Hermana Parker

18 February 2013

El Fin Se Acerca – February 18, 2013

Dear Family and Friends,

Last night as I gave our weekly numbers to our zone leaders they began to sing to me the hymn "El Fin Se Acerca" -- it is a lovely little hymn by Eliza R Snow (in english it is called "The Time is Far Spent") and all too fitting for this point in my mission...

The translation in Spanish is quite different from the english wording, although the sentiment is similar, I think I like it better in spanish. It says (to roughly translate) "The end is getting closer and there is little time, so you should proclaim what God has commanded. Go out then, brothers, and with faith proclaim that God has once again established his kingdom."

So, that is what I am trying to do this last week. There really is little time, but I am going to love and cherish and work hard for every second I have left.

This week was good. We had a wildly successful branch activity on Thursday night. We had maybe 50 people come, which is nearly triple what we get on Sundays. We played games with water balloons with all the kids (there were A LOT) and had a treasure hunt and a spiritual thought by the elders and some refreshments at the end. It was so fun to see some life and energy in the branch. Hermana Baker and I are seriously now best friends with tons of little kids here in Reconquista. They say hi to us in the streets. They adore us. Mainly because we gave them water balloons and played duck duck goose with them.

We are now going to start the tradition of a weekly "branch night," every Friday night.

On Saturday was our investigator Anahi´s baptism and Sunday was her confirmation. It was very low-key. She is a 15 year old girl that is sort of shy and a little anti-social and so she asked for it to just be her family and the missionaries. It was small, but nice, and will be the last baptism of my mission, so that alone makes it special.

Yesterday right after church there was a sudden HUGE thunderstorm, but Hermana Baker and I were hungry and needed to get back to our apartment for lunch and for our studies, so instead of waiting it out (like some branch members) we raided the cleaning closet for trash bags and made ourselves some make-shift ponchos and braved the rain and the 40 minute walk home. Hermana Baker even wore a stylish plastic grocery bag around her head like a bonnet. We looked awesome. And we still got pretty soaking wet.

Well that´s it. See you VERY soon. But not before I write you again next week.

Love,

Hermana Parker

12 February 2013

Reconquista Part 2 – February 11, 2013

Dear Family and Friends,

I think this has got to be the most surreal part of my mission. I feel completely caught between two worlds. I feel like I am working just as hard, if not harder and there is, as always, SO MUCH work to do. So many families to visit, and prayers to pray, and family home evenings to plan, and doors to knock, and stories to listen to. My mind is still very much absorbed in my work here and in this dear, little, struggling branch in Reconquista. But, I am not in denial, either...the end is near. Soon it will all be over and the feeling is bittersweet.

The other night I had this funny dream that was like a mix of the two worlds I am currently caught between. I was in a fancy mall-type place that was filled with stores and movie theaters and also classrooms and auditoriums like you would find on BYU campus. I haven't been in a place like that in 18 months, and it definitely felt like it represented "home" and the U.S,. -- the place I am going back to shortly.

But, representing Argentina and the "world" of my mission-- I was there with my companion (ever at my side), and in the theater they were playing the Joseph Smith movie, and throughout the dream we were running away from some of the dirty diseased vicious dogs that plague the streets here. It was kind of funny, but a pretty good representation of my psyche right now.

Anyways, I am sitting here a little dazed and battered, thinking about all the news from home and all that has happened here this week. Life sure does know how to throw us some pretty big blows and sometimes it can feel so overwhelming and terrifying, it is hard to know what to do...

On Thursday this week we went to visit one of our investigators, Betty. She is a wonderful woman, a mother of 7. Two of her younger sons were baptized last year and a few weeks ago she asked to talk to us because she wants to make some changes in her life. She wants desperately to repent and change and start new and find peace.

She was really torn up on this particular day because her husband had just left her the night before, all alone with the 7 kids (including one severely disabled daughter) to go work in the south of Argentina. Betty has no family members here in Reconquista and he was going to be gone for about a year, working and saving money. She was devastated that he was going to be so far away for so long, but the economic situation is not ideal and he has the possibility of earning a lot more at this new job, so he decided to leave the family and go, and Betty had this sort of sad resigned acceptance.

This Thursday we also met Hernan for the first time--her 9 year old son who was baptized in November. He is a beautiful child. Curious, full of life and energy.

The very next day after meeting him, and after comforting Betty in her moment of difficulty, we got some terrible news. When Betty was out doing some errands, Hernan and his brother Rodrigo started playing with fire in the backyard and things got out of control and somehow the fire exploded onto Hernan and his whole body lit on fire. The details are terrifying, like something from a horror movie... he ran screaming, skin burning, and threw himself into a neighbors portable pool. For a while there were questions about whether or not he would live. He is now in a children´s hospital in Santa Fe (Capital) and reported to be in stable condition, but with severe burns all over his entire body. He will never be the same again and a plastic surgeon will have to work on skin grafts and reconstructing his face.

The whole family is pretty shaken up. And the timing is so heart wrenching. I understand that God is in control and I really believe that. But sometimes you ask yourself---why now? How much can one heart take?

Please send Jade my love and a big hug. I am praying for her and I am so excited to see her in 2.5 weeks. And please pray for Betty and Hernan and the entire family.

The older brother, Rodrigo, is struggling with a terrible burden of guilt. He came to church on Sunday looking for a little peace. His grandma said he seemed to come home doing a little better.

Time´s up. That´s all I´ve got.

I love you,

Hermana Parker

Prayer – February 4, 2013

Dear Family and Friends,

It is strange to think I am writing my last few emails from Argentina. We are SO busy here in Reconquista it is hard to get too distracted about coming home. We are still learning our area and the bus routes and good shortcuts to get to one neighborhood to another and meeting members and buying maps and setting up lunches with members and organizing branch activities and baptisms and baby blessings and all sorts of things.

I want to write about EVERYTHING, but time is short and I have to register for spring classes, so this might be random but I want to just write about one of our lunch appointments this week,

We had lunch last Wednesday with hermana Nelly, an older widowed woman, mother of 9, in the branch. About noon we were wandering around looking for her house, a little lost. We finally made it onto her street and we saw her right away, standing barefoot outside of her house, tall and alert, glancing up and down her street, obviously looking for us, worried we might not find it. We waved to her and she breathed a visible sigh of relief and welcomed us warmly. We followed her as she walked, with her dusty bare feet, down a dirt path to her humble little brick house.

When we got inside the food was already served and blessed and it was delicious, but it was also SO hot outside, that without a fan or any type of air circulating, her little kitchen was more like a brick oven, and sweat collected on our brows and dripped down our faces as we ate. We had to use a little dish towel to dab ourselves off every minute or so.

The best moment, though, came after we had eaten and shared a scripture and we asked if we could end with a prayer. She said yes and offered to give it, and then we bowed our heads and she uttered one of the most beautiful prayers I have ever heard. It was a simple moment, but I feel like I learned more about prayer sitting there, sweating in this humble woman´s kitchen, listening to her pray, than I have in months (or even years) of study. When she prayed I felt that she really knew and loved who she was talking to.

She started by saying "Father in heaven, we, a group of thy daughters, bow our heads before thee this afternoon to give thee thanks..." I felt power in the words "we, a group of thy daughters." She then began to thank God for many many things. She thanked him for "this beautiful hot day" and then thanked him for our bodies and that we can feel heat and feel cold. She thanked him for giving us strength and endurance even on days when it is very hot. She thanked him for our health, our families and for many other things I am now forgetting. Then, she asked for a few simple blessings. She blessed our legs and our feet that they would have the strength to keep walking and continue on our way that afternoon. She blessed us to be able to continue to endure the heat well. And I remember that she pleaded with God that his "mantle of mercy" ("manto de misericordia") would cover us and that we would be guarded and protected from all harm and danger.

I remember she finished by saying "Lord, we ask for these things, but we also thank thee, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen."

There was just something so powerful and beautiful in the way she prayed, focusing primarily on giving thanks and then gently, lovingly, invoking the blessings of heaven upon us. I will never forget that small, sacred moment, when I learned so much about prayer, bowing my head and sweating in Hermana Nelly´s kitchen.

That´s it until next week,

Hermana Parker

28 January 2013

Santa Fe, are you there? Do you swear you won't forget me? -- January 28, 2013

Dear Family and Friends,

I was transferred, I´m training, we´re opening a new area, AND we have a special assignment in our new area.

I am serving in Reconquista in the province of Santa Fe. They haven´t had sister missionaries in Santa Fe for almost 10 years. They sent us here, along with a new senior couple, with a special focus on reactivating inactive members and strengthening the branches here. They want us to bring some new energy and excitement and to focus primarily on getting inactive families back to church. The mission president literally said "If baptisms come, they come, but I want you to focus on reactivating. Breathe some life into the branches there!"

This district has really been struggling the last couple years, in fact it was on the verge of being closed entirely--but now they are seeing what we can do with 4 more missionaries and a lot of hard work. My companion and I have an assigned area for proselyting and teaching investigators, but we have permission to visit members of the church in the whole city of Reconquista (both branches) and the rest of the district too (which includes several outlying towns). We have no limits! No boundaries! No phone calls to the president to ask for permission to "leave our area." It´s amazing! I love it.

I love my new assignment. I also love my awesome new companion Hermana Baker--fresh from the Provo MTC. I love escaping the sort of corrupted, over-zealous, number-monster culture I was experiencing in Formosa. I love focusing on rescuing "lost sheep" and strengthening the church, rather than just getting people to baptism. And the cool thing is, at the same time, we find people who are ready to be baptized. In our 5 short days here we started working with a less-active woman whose 15 year old daughter wants to be baptized.

I also just love Santa Fe and our area in general. If I thought my area in Formosa was rural, I was wrong. Our area here has lots of long dirt roads that literally pass through giant fields with hay bales and horses. And it is OH SO BEAUTIFUL to watch the sun setting over those country roads and fields when we are out walking from one appointment to the next. Our apartment is lovely and has all new furniture and has air conditioning and a balcony and the view from our balcony is a big grassy field bordered by a forest.

It is also fun to open an area because every day is a big adventure. We are learning to read maps and take buses. Our first night here it was pouring rain and thunderstorming, and we were completely lost, and the lights went out all over the whole city, and we made our way home by the light of the lightning that streaked across the sky about every 20 seconds.

Several times a day I spontaneously burst into the Newsies song "Santa Fe" because I am just so enchanted by this place and because it fits so well my sentiments -- "dreams come true, yes they do, in Santa Fe." It´s just a shame I´ll only be here for 4 more weeks...

One fun thing is seeing people’s reactions to having sister missionaries again after almost 10 years. The little kids and newer converts have never even seen sister missionaries. And most of the adults and older members are thrilled. Several times we have shown up on people’s doorsteps and when they saw us they exclaimed: "I can´t believe what I am seeing! Sister missionaries in Reconquista!!" and then they warmly welcomed us.

Anyways, that´s about it for this week. I´ll send pictures next week and tell you more about our grand adventures.

Love,

Hna Parker

Barrero y J.J. Paso – January 21, 2013

Dear Family and Friends,

This week was nice.

Starting off this week it was a little like starting new in the area. Most of our progressing investigators were either baptized or had moved to other areas and seeing as we were homebound for most of the two previous weeks caring for my sick companion, we were not able to look for many new investigators or keep the work moving here.

So, we started out asking for and looking up references from members, talking to everyone we met, knocking doors, tracking down inactive members and old investigators, and everything else we could think of to try to find new people to teach.

I think looking for new investigators is still the most challenging and daunting part of missionary work for me. Although I have learned how to be more outgoing on my mission, talking to new people is still a little terrifying. But I am always surprised and grateful to see that as I try my best to get over my fears and shyness and do my little part, God does His. We had some wonderful experiences this week talking to new people and visiting new neighborhoods.

This week we were talking to some people and one man said that he lived in the neighborhood behind Divino Niño (a huge and very popular Catholic church here in my area). I had no idea there was a neighborhood back there and I have been in my area almost 6 months, so we decided to check it out. It is BEAUTIFUL, in a quaint, humble, rural sort of way. There are all this little houses scrapped together from cardboard and wood, and they are all situated along the shore of a tiny river.

There in that neighborhood tucked away behind Divino Niño, we found several amazing new investigators and a handful of inactive members who all received us well. One young man, Pedro, lives in a tiny house with his mom and several adult siblings and nieces and nephews. They have a little wooden boat and often cross to the other side of the river where there is a tiny forest and where they also have planted a large garden with watermelons, tomatoes, lettuce, onions, etc.

We are going to go back tomorrow and I am going to take pictures because Wednesday we have transfers and....

It looks like I will be leaving Parque! My mission president was in town for a conference this week and he called me for an interview. We talked a little about how I´m doing, and everything that happened with Hna Espinoza, and my thoughts as I finish my mission and then he told me he was thinking about giving me a special assignment in my last transfer. Nothing is set in stone, but next week I MIGHT be writing to you from a new area in the province of Santa Fe (an area where previously there were never sister missionaries). I will be sad to leave, but I am also excited to work hard, with a renewed energy, in a fresh new area.

Thank you all for your emails and pictures and love. I am so excited to get back to you all in just a little over a month. Today I received my re-acceptance to BYU and I am registering for classes here in Argentina. Weird.

Love,

Hna Parker

Mexico -- January 14, 2013

Dear Family and Friends,

It was another crazy week, but thankfully now things have settled down and are basically back to normal.

After the first time in the hospital, we took it very easy, only going to a few appointments every day and mostly resting and recuperating in our lovely air conditioned bedroom. A couple days I went out and worked with Hermana Luna, while Hermana Luna´s mom came and stayed with and cared for Hermana Espinoza. Still, my poor little Hermana ended up in the hospital THREE more times last week, once in the middle of the night. She had a bunch of different things going on at once (inflammation in her whole body, back pain, knee pain, etc) but the worst was that on Tuesday morning she woke up with a head-splitting, excruciating migraine that not even the strongest drugs seemed to kick for long and that went on for days. We created what I called "the cave," covering our window with three blankets so that not even a tiny beam of light could come inside. Any tiny bit of light was excruciating to her, as well as all sounds and movements. It was quite dark and cool and cozy in the cave, and the rest of the house is SO HOT--so I would usually just chill in the cave in the pitch darkness, with my sheet thrown over my head and a flashlight and my scriptures.

In the end Hermana Espinoza was just too sick to be here, so far from home, in hot hot Formosa, with the stress of a missionary schedule and lifestyle. Late on Thursday night she was in such pain that she was crying and moaning and I was just so scared and didn´t know what to do to help her. Our neighbors are these two young gals about our age that are both nurses. I called them over and they took a look at her, took her blood pressure, and injected her with some of the pain meds that they had given her a few days before in the clinic (the last time these meds seemed to work for a few hours, so it was a good temporary solution). But then they told me she really urgently needed to go be seen by a doctor. The public hospital here had traumatized us quite a bit (we took photos the last time, and when I get home I will show them to you. it is awful) and we felt it would be pointless to go back to the same place, with the same symptoms, just to recieve the same attention by the same incompetent staff and later to be given the same results (inconclusive). However, we felt trapped because we had been given instructions by our leaders not to go to a private clinic because they would charge a lot of money. Our neighbors agreed that she should not go to the public hospital, because it is usually crowded and hectic and poorly staffed. They referred us to a place called Sanatorio Formosa where one of them works and told us more or less how much a basic checkup and a few of the tests she might need would cost. We decided that in the end, if the mission couldn’t pay, that we would find some other way to pay and that we just needed to go right then. These girls were so helpful and good to us--they called some friends who were working at that hour and asked them to please help us, and wait for us, and give us the best attention.

Our experience was much better this time. The private clinic was a lot cleaner and safer and we were very well attended by the nurses and doctors. Still, there was not much they could do without admitting her or doing some expensive studies--so they gave her an IV with some more pain meds, the doctor gave her a prescription for a different sort of migraine medicine, and he recommended two months more of rest and that she go home to Mexico.

We talked with our leaders and mission doctors in the morning and everyone agreed. She needed to go home. She left Saturday morning. And now I am back full time with Hna Luna for another couples weeks.

I am attaching here some photos of my first and last day with Hna Espinoza. We took a picture with one of our neighbors, Yesica, that was so good to us (the other was working) and her kitten Valentino (I love this kitten).

I am also attaching photos from our baptisms this Saturday. That is a whole other story, perhaps I will explain next week, but Franco and Belen were both baptized on Saturday.

I love you all and I am SO grateful for your love and kind words and encouragement.

Love,

Hna Parker